Miracle at Marshill

I originally wrote the following three or four years ago.


It was the end of January and I was discouraged. That's an understatement. I had lost all hope. And although I wasn't planning on acting on it, death seemed the only solution. I needed people to pray with me. I needed to hear (or read) those prayers, not just have them promised to me, so I went into my favourite place to chat.

Well, I tried. My slow computer wouldn't let me in, my next favourite chat room was empty and when I went to another Christian chat room, though folks were in the prayer room, they weren't praying and I just couldn't state my need. Eventually I managed to get into my first choice but the same problem existed--how do I state my need? I sat in the Prayer Room alone, but no one came. I went into the Lobby a few times but didn't feel comfortable saying anything.

Finally, in desperation, I went to Marshill. Marshill is the place to avoid. It's the place to debate. No one goes there unless they want to be quartered and thumbnailed to the wall; chewed up and spat out; stomped on and swept down the drain. But I was desperate! I NEEDED prayer. I went into the room, there were only about four or five people present, and without waiting for a lot of conversation to pass by, told them my need. They cared but after chatting for a few minutes, I got a phone call which lasted 15-20 minutes. I was sure I'd be forgotten and the conversation would move on. Chat room conversations can be rather fickle. However, the whole time I was on the phone, the folks in Marshill waited for me, not starting other conversations, and in fact some went to gather others. The room was much fuller when I returned.

We talked briefly and then I asked if they would mind praying with me. Do you know what they did? The entire room left Marshill and went to the prayer room. I couldn't believe it! I had never seen or heard of such a thing happening, ever! They began to pray. It wasn't just one or two praying. Everyone prayed. There were people there I didn't even know, all praying for me. More came pouring in. The prayer room was full and over-flowing. At one point the entire population of chat was in the prayer room.

It was an awesome time of prayer. They prayed for me for a very long time, this prayer room packed with people, and gradually, as God began to heal me, giving me hope and peace, the prayer turned into an incredible chorus of praise. It was marvelous! Unimaginable! A real blessing from God--not just for me but for all who were there, the most moving prayer meeting I've ever been to.

And, as I've said, God healed the pain, the despair, the hopelessness and filled me with hope, joy, peace. I am so grateful to God. Our God IS an awesome God. And the Miracle of Marshill will stay with me for a very long time.

Suffering--An Invitation to Intimacy

I was recently sharing some of the difficulties of my marriage and said that it's been over 30 years of hell but that I've remained because I know God wants me to. Someone wrote and asked, "Why would God want us to go through hell? That's just plain cruel." This was my reply:


Oh! I can tell right away that this will be a long answer. I want to tell you right away that God is incredibly good and this doesn't change simply because my circumstances are bad.

God is not cruel. He loves us so very, very much. So why the pain? Well, for one, it has pushed me to God in a way nothing else could have. I walked away from God in the early years of my marriage. That solved nothing. When I returned to God, I began to take my difficulties and pain to Him. Would I have continued seeking His face if there hadn't been a need? I know that when things are going well, I have a tendency to stop reading my Bible and praying. I know others are the same way. So pain keeps my mind fixed on God and since I want God more than anything else, this is a good thing.

But I had an insight when I went through some guided meditations on the stations of the cross at a church I visited on Good Friday. It's a concept that will totally change my attitude about suffering.

When we, as people, are going through hard times--a death in the family, say, or some other great difficulty--who do we go to? We go to our closest friends. And those who truly care about us come alongside us and walk through the hard times with us. And those who have walked with us through the painful times are those with whom we stay close. Walking through that valley together strengthens our bond and knits us together in a way nothing else can. There are many fair weather friends but how many will stick close through the pain? Very few. Those who do, become our most intimate friends.

The Bible says we are called to share in Christ's sufferings. I never really understood the impact of this before. But when I suffer, what I am doing is sharing in Christ's sufferings. I get a glimpse, through my suffering, of what HIS suffering was like. It's a way of me walking through His valley with Him. Many of us run away from the pain that comes to us--or at least we try to. That's why there are so many addictions of various kinds and so much divorce. But when we are willing to ACCEPT the pain that life deals us, then we have the unique opportunity to know God better. It's like an invitation to intimacy with God. Only those who are willing to share in Christ's sufferings can truly know and understand Him. This is the path to intimacy with God and a deep relationship that nothing can shake.

I want that intimacy. I want to be in that place of depth with God. And so, as much as I hate the pain, I will stay in it because I want God more. And, in the pain, I am trusting God. He's given me a personal promise that my marriage will be made wonderful and new. That was two years ago and I've seen no sign of it yet but even if I never see that happen, I will trust God. In Job 13, Job said, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him."

Why has it been so long? I don't know. I do know that God could have changed things long ago. Have I been disobedient and thus blocked God from working in some way? I don't know. Is it that God is respecting my husband's free choice to make wrong choices? I don't know. I do know that He loves me more than I can comprehend, that His arms are around me, protecting me, and that He has my best good in mind. And I love the thought that this pain I'm in is God's invitation for intimacy with me. If pain is what it takes for me to enter that place with my God, then so be it. He will carry me through.

All that I've said is true for you too. God wants the same level of intimacy with you and if you are going through hard times, consider that His invitation for you to walk with Him through His sufferings so you can know Him deeper and more intimately. He was despised and rejected. Are you feeling that way too? Then you are sharing in His suffering if, indeed, you choose to walk in that valley instead of running away.

God is good. He is intensely good and He loves us with a passion that burns everything rotten that is in us. Isn't that a wonderful thing?

Happy Easter!

Christ is Risen!


He is Risen INDEED!

Trust, Defend, Vindicated

Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him. Even so, I will defend my own ways before Him. He also shall be my salvation, For a hypocrite could not come before Him. Listen carefully to my speech, And to my declaration with your ears. See now, I have prepared my case, I know that I shall be vindicated. Job 13:15-18 NKJ

Lord, You may send me through the fire and crush me in the crucible but I know You are my salvation. Without You, I am nothing. You know my ways and You know how my heart is for You alone. Vindicate me!

Valley, Comfort, Protection

Even when I walk through the dark valley of death, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You welcome me as a guest, anointing my head with oil. Psalm 23:4,5 NLT

Lord, thank you for being with me in this dark valley. Thank you for your protection and your comfort. Thank you for your blessings.